Rotten Tomatoes

     So tired. But, sometimes, the Blogs written while I am tired turn out to be the best ones...


     I've been battling a respiratory thing for months now, and, honestly, it's wearing me right out. So, most days are just a blur anymore. This past weekend, I guiltily laid in my recliner, thinking of the myriad of things I needed to get done. I got up and mowed the lawn. I spent an hour trying to breathe properly again. I cooked dinner. And spent an hour completely worn out. And, apparently, I tormented any child - mine or not - that came near me.


     The Sunday began with Joe leaving for his week long trip to Scout Camp. He will be roughing it on the banks of Chautauqua Lake, and enjoying his days in the water. I was informed on Saturday, that he was declaring Saturday a day of Celebration and Mourning. Celebration, because it was his last day at home, and, mourning, because he would be gone for a week. The rest of my kids were in celebration mode because he would be gone and we could have decent foods again, now that the pickiest eater in the house is gone for a few days. Poor Joe.


     Shortly after Joe left, Kaila was scrolling thru her phone, when she read aloud in horror "Mom! listen to this:  "Man trades baby for 15 Big Macs"! That's terrible!"


     "You are so right." I agreed.


     "I know! Who does that?!"


     "I would have totally hold out for fries and a strawberry shake, before handing the baby over..." I continued musingly.


     "MOM! I am so glad, as the oldest, you didn't trade me in for Big Macs. Wow."


     "You truthfully have no way to know for sure that you are my oldest, now, do you?" I pointed out.


    So, my status as a terrible person was already set, when we wandered out to the front porch. One of the little neighbor boys from next door came over. He climbed up the stairs to my porch, and looked around suspiciously. Glaring at me, he demanded "Why is there a bee flying on your porch??"


     "Do you like it? I ordered it from Amazon last week, so I could have porch bees." I explained.


     "MOM!" came Kaila's response again.


     After a full day of these things happening, I was told by my eldest, that I needed to be nicer to little children. (The same one who's current motto is: "I don't like children unless I am paid to.")


     "I don't see why I have to curb myself. It's not like I will have to pay for their therapy.


     "MOM!!!!!!" 


     Tuesday, I had taken the day off, because, my amazing 16 year old had saved her babysitting money, and bought tickets to go see One Republic at 6 Flags Darien Lake. We headed out early, so we could play in the park for the day first, before heading over to the concert. And what a concert it was! We had the absolute best time! I think more so, because I still can't believe Kaila did such an amazing thing for me. How many kids do that for their mothers?? We did discuss "people watching" while waiting in line for a ride.
     "I don't know why you like that "People Watching" thing so much." Kaila commented


     "How do you not??"


     "I mean, what's the big deal? It's skeletons wandering around wearing meat suits."


     "That girl right there? She's probably super nice. She looks very sweet. But, she's gorgeous, so, people want to hate her, but they just can't, because, she's just too nice. Which, actually makes people sort of hate the poor thing more."


     "WHAT?"


     "That lady there? The one that has been chewing on the same mouthful of granola for the last ten minutes? She works out. She runs, she probably is, at the very least, a vegetarian, but obnoxious about it, and probably pretty judgy toward anyone who eats anything that includes meat or non organic produce, and, I am pretty sure her neighbors hate her on principal."


     "MOM!"


     "But, her baby is super cute! That little girl over there? She was so excited about today! She wore her special sparkly earrings, her sparkly ring, she painted her finger nails just for the occasion, and gave herself a purple French tip on one finger nail on each hand - and did a good job! - and had her hair specially braided for the day. Also, she is totally in love with her outfit."


     "Wow. You're crazy."


Anyhow. We had a really amazing day, and it was completely worth the sleep deficit the next day.


     We have found, with Joe gone, that George has no idea who to torment. So, he has decided upon Lexi. Unfortunately for George though, while Joe just screams "MOM! George keeps (insert latest transgression here...)" Lexi plays on the same dirty level as George does. So, they have been tormenting each other mercilessly. I am not sure if not hearing Joe's constant howls of "MOM!" is worth the trade off of listening to George's constant howls of "LEXI KICKED ME AGAIN!!!!!" Joe will be coming home late Friday night, and George will be heading off to camp early Saturday morning. Things should be back to normal again next Monday. George misses Joe so much though, that he has slept in Joe's bed every night, as well as drawn a large heart on the wall next to Joe's bed, and colored it in with blue crayon.
     I made the mistake of mentioning that to a friend of mine, and she was slightly horrified that George had drawn on the bedroom wall. A few years ago, I told the kids I didn't care if the drew and/or painted on their bedroom walls, as long as they didn't draw and/or paint on any other walls. Seriously, I have bigger things to worry about. So, the kids' bedrooms tend to be pretty colorful. Also, it assists with the guilt I feel when I look at the boys' bedroom walls. When we bought the house, it was Kaila's room. We painted it Cinderella Blue, and I threw glitter into the still wet paint, so, the entire room sparkles beautifully. I will only be able to stick planets and stars in that room while explaining the sparkles are like the stars in outer space for so long. Eventually the testosterone will kick in, and I will have to up my game around here.


     One last note. I love my gardens. This year, I truly wish I had more time and energy to work in them, but, overall, I love them. I planted two tomato plants in containers and, for lack of anyplace better to stick them, plunked them in front of my porch. I proudly watched these plants grow, and faithfully watered them every day. Every day, I come home from work, look with horror upon my wilted plants, and rush to water them again. There are lots of tomatoes on  my plants. Most of them rotting.
     Who screws up tomatoes?? The easiest plants ever? Apparently, I do. Because, I am not seeing much hope that there will be any decent tomatoes on either of my poor plants. Mostly, I am literally growing rotten tomatoes.
     With the Pokémon Go craze starting up again though, they may just come in handy.


     Alrighty. Break time over. Back to work for me!