Our Anniversary weekend came and went. Once our weekend trip was cancelled, Bearded Man announced he had to work the entire weekend, and that we wouldn't see much of him.
On the actual date of our Anniversary, whatever could go wrong - did. It was so bad, that, the enormity of the awfulness was (nearly but not quite) amusing. The day rounded off with: driving myself to the Urgent Care after slipping on a chunk of wood the kids had left at the bottom of the porch stairs, and the dog eating the cake I baked for the day. It was quite possibly the worst Anniversary to date. I feel like, after 17 of them, I am justified in deciding this was definitely the worst.
Since my ankle was badly sprained, the attempt was made to keep it elevated the next day, but, the gorgeous weather was making it difficult. By Columbus Day, I needed to get out of the house. Whenever this happens, I tell the kids we are going on an adventure. The kids and I love it. So, we packed a picnic, threw everything in the van, and were off.
Keeping the ankle in mind, I decided not to explore some semi local off the beaten path waterfalls, and try to find this place called "Little Rock City", instead. We have all spent lots of time at another local place, called "Rock City" which, I decided was outside my current capabilities, so, why not try a smaller, presumably more do-able version?
An hour of driving as we tried to find it later, We ended up on what we thought was the right road. Which turned into a rock strewn dirt road. That seemed to go on forever.
Soon, we were followed by a large pickup truck that tailgated me, as I navigated the rough terrain while imagining flat tires and no cell service or someone coming the opposite direction, on this scary one lane dirt road clearly leading strait to hell. There was no place to pull off, no place to turn around, and certainly no way to get out of the way, should another vehicle to attempt to drive out of this place.
Eventually, after what seemed like forever, the pickup truck and I ended up at a dead end where several other vehicles were parked. We had presumably arrived. A vague sign indicated that the trails were to the right and to the left. We gazed around and just saw trees. No signs of trails anywhere.
The occupants of the pickup hopped out, and I had a sinking feeling, as I watched them. The passenger looked like she had stepped right out of the middle spread of an Outdoor Adventure magazine. Hiking boots, khaki pants, white tank top with an olive drab green button up shirt thrown casually over that, blond hair in the perfect sporty cut... The male driver hopped into the back of the truck, and began donning special socks, hiking boots, a backpack with water carrier in it.
A glance at my children, who were all wearing jeans and sneakers, after I vetoed Lexi's long sweeping prairie skirt and Kaila's cowgirl boots, and my own swollen ankle, and I began to panic inside.
"Look at those two guys, Mom! They have a backpack!" one of my kids remarked.
"I think the passenger is a girl." I corrected.
"No, I think it's a guy" my kids all agreed.
"It has BOOBS, it's a GIRL!" I insisted without thinking. At which, all four of my kids took a look at the poor hiker's chest.
"SHE is not an "IT"!" hissed Kaila "And, could you PLEASE not talk about HER boobs so loudly?? What if she hears us???"
"I was just saying, that's not a guy. Let's figure out where a trail is."
We were off. The boys found me a walking stick, and we entered the woods. In the middle of nowhere. With four kids, a sprained ankle, no cell service and no idea where we were. "Let's go on an Adventure, she said. It will be FUN, she said!" Mumbled my ever optimistic teenager, as she trudged beside me.
After wandering for while, we somehow stumbled upon trail markers, and decided to follow them. At least with trail markers, we were not wandering quite so blindly, right? The boys made it a challenge to do the entire trail at a run, as they raced ahead to find more trail markers. It wasn't until we had been in the woods for awhile that the thought occurred to me: What if, in this vast expanse of forest, the trail markers weren't leading us in a nice little circle, but, deep into the forest and we might now be nowhere near where we needed to be, to get back to our vehicle? The other hikers had come prepared with sensible gear and backpacks and water and hiking clothes. What was I thinking? What kind of mother takes her kids to the middle of nowhere in the woods to go hiking with absolutely no idea what she is doing? I grew up hiking around the woods, but, my kids hadn't. What if we needed to figure out how to backtrack out of this place?
"MOM! There is a guy riding around the woods on his bike!!!" One of the kids yelled loudly. Sure enough, there was a lycra clad man, with a backpack strapped on, attempting to ride his bike through the mess. Which turned out to be the end of the trail. We were right near where we had begun, thank the dear Lord. We stumbled out of the woods right near the sweetest little shelter/picnic table. It had a roof and the table built right into it. It was nestled in a clearing but out of sight of the parking area. It looked like it belonged in a fairy tale. The kids couldn't wait to check it out. And, check it out, they did. They proceeded to spend our entire picnic, reading the awful things that previous picnickers had written and carved into the posts and ceiling of the picnic area.
Memories and stuff.
Deciding that the adventure was over for the day, we re-packed our van and prepared to leave. It was with some smugness, that we noted that the pickup truck with the prepared hikers that had followed us in, had already left. The kids and I were extremely proud that we outlasted them, (wandering blindly about the woods, but, that doesn't count) and it absolutely made the trip worth it.
On to other things. George, actually. George is now in Kindergarten. Every night at dinner, we say grace and then the kids all wait for me to say "So. How was your day?" and then we all talk about school. George's recent recitation went as such:
"First we did reading and math and then we did group and circle time andIonlyhadtositintimeoutforateenytinylittlebit and then we went outside and then it was lunchtime - "
"WAIT! Back up. WHAT did you just say?"
"We went outside, Mama."
"Before that?"
"Oh. Lunch? I ate all my lunch, Mama."
It took some digging, but, it seems George was in time out at school for talking too much. A recent update on that indicated he has been in time out "Only five times for talking too much, Mama! There are LOTS of kids who are in time out way more than that." Not going to lie here. I am dreading Parent Teacher conferences next month.
Also, the dinner debacles continue. I continue to cook. My kids continue to refuse to eat. Joe, in particular. The other day, I may a big pot of cheddar broccoli soup. It was so good. Seriously. Restaurant worthy soup. I could eat it all day every day.
Soup was ladled into bowls and passed around the table, and Joe's hysterics began. Some days I am more tolerant of it than others. Before I could decide if this was a tolerant day or not, George stepped in.
"Joe! Stop whining! All you have to do is say 'Mama. This is so so good. It's great! But, I am not hungry right now, so, I can't eat it. Thanks for cooking dinner. It's very good' Then, later, you just say you are hungry, and you can make yourself something before bed. So stop crying!!!!!"
I don't think George knew I heard that, because, he then turned around and said "This is so good Mom. I really like it! I am just not hungry right now. I will maybe have some later, but, I can't eat now. Thanks, Mom!"
The boy is FIVE. I had no idea I have been getting played by my five year old.
That about sums up life in the household these days. We went from the busiest summer I can remember, with weekends packed full of exciting things, to, Nothing. This has been quite the adjustment in our household. I think some creativity is going to have to happen, or, it has the potential to be a very long winter.
Till next time!
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