Franklinville is a very small town, with lots of kids, and lots of fund raisers. School fund raisers, sport fun raisers, 4-H fund raisers, Scout fund raisers..... they are everywhere. Through fun raisers, one may purchase magazines, candy, cheesecake, chocolates, wrapping paper, flowers, first aid kits, candles, popcorn, pizza, cookies, ice cream.... you can donate money for different causes, reasons, for runs/walks/bike rides/jump roping. For the playground/fire dept/church/or some auxillary or other. The food pantry/charities/troops/toddlers/hospitals. The list is endless. We are a tiny town, but, we are a generous town. Even though we live in a place not known for wealth and prosperity, we collectively manage to find time to help out, money to donate, and we take care of our own as best we can. If there is a need, there is always a crowd of people there to help.
All this being said; my own children have had several fund raisers lately. Kaila and Joe, primarily. Kaila's style of fund raising is as such;
Kaila. You are really reaching the end of your time to get your stuff sold. You need to get out and hit pavement child, and get this done.
Fine. Tomorrow.
No. Today.
It's cold.
Wear a coat.
Do you WANT me to be sick? Are you TRYING to get me sick? You do know, that if I am sick, you will be stuck with me home from school. It's not good for my education. Do you WANT me to fail?
Don't forget your hat and mittens, kiddo.
Ugh. Fine. I am taking my bike.
What? Why? You are starting out next door. It's less than 50 feet away.
I need to take my bike. It has a basket. I need to take my pens, papers, wallet, phone, lipgloss, purse, house key.... I need my bike. LEXI! I am using your helmet!
MOM! She just TOOK my helmet, and didn't even ask! I say she can't use it.
Fine. Than I don't have to go fund raising.
Get the helmet on, and get going!
10 minutes later.....
KAILA! WHAT are you doing? Have you even left the yard yet??
I am GOING!
Rides bike 10 feet away to the next door neighbor's porch.
Nobody home, Mom!
20 minutes later
I couldn't sell anything. Sorry!
Kaila. did you go there, there, there, there, there, there, or there? (I say, pointing to half a dozen houses within sight of our front porch.
No.
OMG. Kaila.
And so it goes. It's a brutal process. Joe, however, is the polar opposite.
Mom. I have flowers, candles, first aid kits and coupon books to sell.
Okay.
You need this stuff, mom.
Okay. I will buy something soon,
No time like now, Mom
Not right now, Joe, I am cooking dinner. I will buy something before you need to turn it in.
One hour later;
Mom. You really need all of this stuff. If you look here, there are coupons for Arby's, Subway, and a grocery store. You will save a lot of money, and get things you like. And, the candles have a lot of scents. I know you like lilacs. I am selling a lilac scented candle. And Dad likes apple pies. There is an apple pie scented candle. There is also a 4 pack of candles. You can have it all for $35.00. Not much at all!
Joe! I promise I will buy something! Just, not now!
One hour later;
Mom. You are a nurse.
Thanks for the update, son.
You know how important medical care is.
Yup.
I am selling first aid kits. There are kits for sports - Kaila and I will both be in baseball and soft ball this year. We should carry these. There are kits for camping. I am going camping with scouts. You want me to be safe, right? There are kits for your car, and for home. You and Dad should both have one of these for your trucks. And one for home. If you buy the big kit, it includes all of this for only $85.00!
Joe. I am a nurse. We have medical stuff everywhere. We're good.
Mom. You do not understand. This has everything, in an easy to carry case! All in one spot, already put together.
Joe! For goodness sake, I will order sometime, just not NOW!
One hour later.
Mom. You love flowers.
UUUGGGGHHH! Yes, Joe. I do.
Well. You can never have too many flowors, Mom!
True.
And, you talked about putting in a new garden!
I did.
And, you need to put something where the lilac tree that died, was, right?
Yes.
And, maybe more in the garden by the patio.
Get to the point, Joseph.
Well, I have a whole BOOK full of beautiful flowers for sale! And strawberries! You know how much Lexi loves strawberries!
For the love of - okay, give me the book.
If you look here, we have lots of different kinds. There is a whole package of nothing but blue flowers. Your favorite color! And bleeding hearts. You love hearts!
I have bleeding hearts.
There is also a butterfly garden available. You love butterflies, Mom.
Yup.
Mom. You DESERVE flowers. You need to buy something for yourself. Maybe you could even tell Dad to buy them for you. Instead of flowers from a store, he could get you a whole garden full, that comes back every year! Unlimmited flowers!
HAHAHAHA! I like the way you think!
You deserve flowers, Mom. Heck! If I had the money, I would buy them for you. Pick out as many as you like! The whole book, even!
Joe, you realize you have tried to sell me almost $300. in merchandise today.
It's for a good cause, Mom. And it's useful things you need and deserve. Here is a pen and the order form. Fill out your name..... very good, now, what should I start to mark for you? We should start with the blue garden collection.
Joe! Not yet! I am just looking right now!
Might as well do it now, Mom. You know how busy you are. Now is a good time.
Oh, okay.
I am going to need the money up front. I prefer cash, but will accept a good check.
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