Listen. I realize I keep writing all these Blogs about all these races and all this exercise. I know I keep torturing myself and my friends and my family by dragging them along with me. For all intents and purposes, I "should" be a svelte smaller size and the envy of the neighbors.
I am none of the above.
It seems that, in order to actually get svelte, one must do more than think very strongly about it. One most do more than sign up to race a few miles a few times a year. Do more than write about it.
Anyhow, Things needed to be stepped up a notch. I have no time to go to a gym. I need to get the kids ready for school before I leave for work in the morning. Then dinner needs to be on the table after work. Then there is the nagging to complete homework and chores and the hauling of children to whatever they need to be hauled to. Also, I would kind of like to see my kids as much as possible. (Except this morning. This morning the arguing was terrible and I skipped out the door pretty quickly.)
Also, my kids. They need to move more. This summer was spent EXACTLY how I had hoped it would not be. In front of the TV/iPad/Kindle, while mom and dad worked all day. Except George, who cannot be still for any amount of time ever. And whose hair is this amazing sun bleached dark blond that actually looks almost white in places. George has spent the summer on his bike, at his friend's, or in his friend's pool. He has worn his old bike right out, and a new one needed to be found, to keep up with him.
The three older kids though. They. Did. Nothing. At all. And then there is the family room, where two of them hide out all day, getting dressed shortly before the parental return to home after work. No matter how much they are hollered at to get off the couch and get outside, back through the side entry into the family room they would sneak. And right back in front of the television. Or the iPad. (The iPad was actually tucked away most of the summer, but, when it was out, they were on it constantly.) Seriously. Something had to be done.
Why not turn the Family Room into a workout room? WHY do I keep getting these ideas that require more energy than I actually have??
It would solve a lot of problems, really, if, we threw away the falling apart sofa in the family room, as well as the falling apart recliner, and replaced it with workout equipment! Craigslist is a wonderful thing, where a person can find pretty much any item they need at reasonable prices.
Within minutes of my announcement that the Family Room was an issue and that changes needed to be made, Bearded Man had found a workout machine on Craigslist. It looked useful and in good shape and of reasonable size. It was approximately an hour and a half away from home, but, still do-able.
We made a trip of it. Bearded Man and I, along with the boys, climbed into the truck, and headed for Grand Island, near Niagara Falls. Where, we ended up at the home of a young man from England. Who was slightly taken aback when George marched up to him, stuck out his hand and said with great dignity "My name is George. Nice to meet you."
After approximately 2 seconds listening to the lovely English accent, I felt like the most backwoods bumpkin EVER. No one can make words sound as beautiful as an English person. (Side note, we have an accent???? While on vacation at Black Lake a few weeks ago, it was commented on quite a bit, that we have quite the accent, and it is difficult to understand us. Who knew! We have an accent!!! Wish I knew what it sounded like to other people.)
Down into the Englishman's basement we went. Where we came to a screeching halt in front of an enormous pile of metal. A very long, very wide, very intimidating, pile of metal. "Oh boy." I said. This was entirely more intimidating and large and more, than I had planned for. Curse me and my darn ideas!!!! I could have been home reading the new Nora Roberts book. But no. I am on the other end of the state, staring at an entire truckload of metal, listening to the boys argue, feeling like an uneducated hick, next to the wondrous English accent of this very nice young man, sweltering under punishing humid heat, and wondering if I could make enough money trading it to the scrapyard, to get a massage instead, while coming to my senses.
Anyhow, we loaded the beast onto the truck, Bearded Man tied the whole mess down, and we were off.
"Oh look, Mom" comments Joe, "That billboard says that 1 in 5 children go hungry."
"KNOCK IT OFF, JOSEPH. YOU are NOT hungry!!! YOU just refuse to eat anything we put in front of you! There is a DIFFERENCE!"
On that note, we did decide to stop and feed the boys. We were right near a Thai restaurant that I had visited once with some co workers, and had the most wonderful delicious dish called "Amazing Chicken". It was so amazing, that I have wanted to go back there ever since, just to try it again. It took some convincing, but, Bearded Man decided to bypass Arby's, and try out the Thai place.
I do not know who was more traumatized by the experience. Joe, for having been dragged completely out of every single comfort zone EVER, or, us, for having to listen to his commentary during the entire stay.
The Amazing Chicken continues to be delicious. However, I will probably never take a family member there again.
Once home, the hauling out of the family room began. Once the couch was out, and the machine in, the building began. Along with some creative language and some inventive phrases, and several irritated comments from Bearded Man.
Eventually it was together. And a offer of an exercise ball and an elliptical was accepted.
"Jasin, I agreed to an elliptical, too. This ratty old recliner is going to have to go. Look at it - it's dirty and disgusting and the springs are broke, and no one ever sits in it anyhow, so -"
"NO."
"What? Why?"
"The. Recliner. Stays."
"What? Why? It's a falling apart MESS!"
"I LIKE it."
"I never see you even sit in it! You fell asleep in it last week, but, I think you've sat in it approximately twice!"
"NO. I LIKE it, I sit in it all the time. The recliner stays."
"Jasin, seriously. It's awful! NOBODY even uses it!"
"Non negotiable."
So, the family room now has a behemoth workout thingy that does eight different things, and uses up considerable (okay, MOST) of the space, and was entirely more machine than I bargained for. It also has a falling apart recliner, a love seat, a weight bench and weight collection, and soon, the addition of an elliptical and an exercise ball.
When I left this morning, the children were all wedged into the love seat, arguing over the TV.
Mission: failure so far.
Also, I still have no energy to actually use any of it.
Craigslist has also been a goldmine for Legos lately. Recently I found the mother load of legos for sale on Craigslist, and, thinking Christmas, bought them on the spot. I drove an hour and 15 minutes to the address given, directly from work, with a nauseating migraine, to pick up these legos. They were safely in the back of the van, where I proceeded to forget about them, and totally forgot to remove them.
Fast forward to this past Saturday, two days after picking them up, and, as we prepared to leave for a wedding, George (who else?) found the legos. The boys now have enough legos to re-build the entire house. Merry Christmas, kids.
One last note. I am leaving for the Jersey Shore for Labor Day weekend, with a friend and her coworker. We are staying at my cousin's home. I need to hop on this exercise stuff and become a size 6 within the next four days. I have my doubts, but, a girl can dream, right? George is pretty sure I will be eaten by sharks. On that note, if not eaten by sharks this weekend, I will check in another time. Happy Labor Day!
No comments:
Post a Comment